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Me Love You Long Time For iPhone

7 Jul

Ok it’s official! Apple is taking over the world! Teenage girls in China are allegedly offering their virginity in exchange for iPhones!

Wow! Please, for their sake and ours, nobody tell them how awesome the new iPad is.

Apparently a girl in China placed an ad online, going the whole nine yards; with pictures, personal information, and a statement claiming that it is her “dream to own an iPhone but my father won’t let me get one.”

First of all, what kind of dream is that? Talk about short-sighted materialism. If you’re going to dream of material things, at least dream big. How about a Lambo? Or a 150-foot yacht?

Second…WTF!? Rather than having to remember losing your virginity to some creepy perv for the rest of your life why not get a job and save up until you can acquire an iPhone the old fashion way by…wait for it……..buying it? The girl has never had sex before! Aren’t girls her age supposed to be a little bit nervous and selective about losing their virginity? Hmm, maybe there’s an app for that.

I’m from the old school where you had to go to prom, date for a couple months, or at least get wasted enough one night and lose it gracefully. For this girl, a new iPhone is enough! Something is awfully wrong with this picture. The fact that she‘s already willing to whore herself out also makes you wonder what damage she‘ll do to herself when she gets older…or even in just a few months when the iPhone 5 is released.

The other funny part about this whole thing is I don’t even like the iPhone. Is it really that great? Now if we were fucking for the latest Blackberry…

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3 Responses to “Me Love You Long Time For iPhone”

  1. Zaida Montieth 07/08/2011 at 5:50 AM #

    Thanks for that article, pretty interesting…


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