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I Blame Rap Music

27 Aug

Today’s dating world is ass backwards. There seems to be fewer gentlemen and more assholes.

I’ve been noticing lately that when a guy is real, honest, open, and well, nice to a girl, he just doesn’t stand a chance. He is trying to do something special for a lady and treat her right but ends up taking the punishment for the piece of shit before him that broke her heart. If he does manage to get her attention and start dating her, he ends up taking on the responsibility of trying to fix what the guy before him broke.

Here we have a guy who would really give her everything she could ever want in a man but she snubs the very thought of him. Ironically, a lot of the girls I’ve been meeting these days are so used to the dick head that hits it and quits it, and could give two shits about them and their feelings, that they almost prefer it. Huh?

These girls are actually into the guy that doesn’t open doors, cusses at them, hits on girls in front of them, doesn’t pay for them, lies to them, doesn’t call them, and just plain and simple, has no respect for them.

As crazy as it sounds, in today’s society where divorce rates are through the roof, and single mothers are left to raise their daughters alone, this phenomenon kinda makes sense.

I mean, how can younger girls get an accurate definition of love and see how a man should treat a woman, when there is no father or a strong male figure in her life? They don’t. These girls grow up without a male presence to “daughter” them and instill in them the need to value themselves and respect themselves. They grow up with no one to remind them every day that they are special and never to settle for anything!

A lot of the girls today are selling themselves short by chasing after the “bad boys”. They get bamboozled and mind-fucked by the guy who’s “exciting” and “edgy”. They fall for the guy that makes their friends and family cringe because they know he will never treat her the way she should be treated. From the outside they watch her get played and can even call his next move before it happens.

For some reason she either doesn’t see it or lives in denial because she wants to believe he loves and accepts her. Maybe she wants to be the one that “tamed the bad boy”. She is intrigued by his dangerous side, but wants him to be the man that is caring and loving.

Unfortunately you can rarely have your cake and eat it too. As people, we are who we are and cannot be changed by anyone but ourselves. No matter how much we try, we will not change someone. If they were an asshole when you met them, they will continue to be an asshole while you’re with them and after you leave them (or they leave you).

Bottom line is this. We all need to respect each other more. Men need to respect women, and women need to respect themselves, and stay away from the bad boys that have “Red Flag” written all over them.

Ladies, give the nice guys a chance…I promise it’ll be worth it. Guys, sack up and swallow your pride. Not calling the girl you supposedly care about, or treating her poorly in front of your boys is so 2008.

It’s not about being the tough, thick skinned, “I don’t give a fuck” guy anymore. It’s about being real, genuine, and making somebody else happy because you are choosing to be with them. Otherwise, just let them go.

Somehow all of these obvious fucking ideas got lost in translation and tradition, between the baby boomers and our generation today.

I blame rap music

Disclaimer: REDFLAG101 does not REALLY blame rap music, and chose this article’s title for entertainment purposes only. We love Weezy and Luda.

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2 Responses to “I Blame Rap Music”

  1. Nikki 09/12/2011 at 9:00 AM #

    This is a great post, and its coming from a guy, which is even better. Just to let you know that not all girls love a bad boy and their Rinky Dinky behaviour… to be honest I find it boring, It does’nt even ruffle my feathers, if I meet a guy who does the old Switcheroo on me I glady step over him without a hair out place. The thing is I too was one of those girls…however there came a day when I was like WTF? What Ive learnt is, yes it would be nice to blame all the total AH Ive dated, etc etc, I had to stand back and say Wait a minute, what the hell is wrong here?…yes it was me, I was broken too. So I could either spend my life living a half life with half life men or I could take responsibility for myself. I got myself into therapy and a support group and slowly my life has turned around. Like you say we are totally powerless over the lives of others but we can change oursleves. It takes work and whole lot of SELF dedication to change habits and behaviours of a lifetime. In my case If I had not done this I can tell you I’d be half way to hell in a hand cart by now. Men today expect women to behave like men, Gladly this women does not behave like a man and Im sorry its gonna take more than a crappy meal and a handful of half hearted crumbs to get me in the sack. I can see the men going…whatta bitch..playing hard to get! No its called self respect and if I cant give it myself, how the hell can I expect to receive it. Yeah men drop like flies when they realise this woman is no joke, Im not. I dont expect anything other than respect, kindness, caring trust and trustworthy behaviour, It does’nt matter to me if your a plumber or a high roller it all adds up to this, if you treat me like a woman I will stick around, you let me down, Im outta here. There are plenty of women who get it, dont worry, and I know for a FACT there are plenty of men who get it too.

  2. Q 11/04/2011 at 6:21 PM #

    Great post! I don’t think rap is all of the blame (parents not doing their job opens the door to rap), but it doesn’t help the situation at all.

    The bottom line is: if women raised their standards, then men would be forced to raise their respect level. Despite all of the bad examples that are playing role models to today’s men, they would all go away if women simply put their foot down.

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