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Bad taste in cars? Bad taste period.

23 Mar

Lets face it, Lambo doors and spoiler wings on a Honda Civic are two major Red Flags that a person has TERRIBLE TASTE. And terrible taste in things automotive can and will reflect in their taste in everything else (music, gifts for their girlfriend/wife, the way they dress, etc.)

This article will pertain mostly to women who are about to meet their man’s “ride” for the first time (being picked up for the first time to go on a date for example), and guys can use this as a guide of what not to do to your ride. Here are a few more Car Mods Red Flags.

DISCLAIMER: I’m a big car guy myself so I’ll try my hardest to not make it sound like a rant.

Here we go…

1. Loud Exhausts on slow cars.

Ladies, if you get picked up for a first date in a car that tests the decibel limits of your hearing, and it is NOT a Lambo, a Ferrari, or other exotics that are naturally loud as shit, consider giving out that first Red Flag to your new man. Give out another Red Flag, if genius decided to use a chimney for an exhaust tip. Fail.

2. Rimz

Please don’t be shy to throw out that Bad Taste Red Flag if the wheels (or rimz) on your man’s car are ridiculously too big for the car he is driving, not proportional, or just look stupid. Give out yet another Red Flag if the rims are worth more than the car itself.

3. Ricer Body Kits

NO, it does not make the car more aerodynamic, and NO there is absolutely no added downforce. If your man claims that’s why he got those goofy bumpers and sideskirts that you kinda remember seeing in Fast in the Furious… Red Flag.

4. Enormous Lifted Trucks.

If you need a ladder to climb inside that behemoth of a truck your man is driving… Red Flag. Does he really expect you to easily climb in there in those short miniskirts you like wearing and flash the entire parking lot? Hmmm.

Ok, I’ll admit, it was pretty cool to be driving a big ass truck… in high school. What are we 17? Let’s grow up a bit. And extra Red Flag if your man drives a ridiculously lifted truck and is shorter than 5’8” in height. I KNOW he has trouble getting up inside it, and I KNOW he can barely reach the pedals. Why is he putting himself thru this?! Answer: Insecurity issues with Napoleon syndrome on the side. Either way you look at it… Red Flag.

Last but certaintly not least…

5. Piece of shit cars made to look like nice cars

Sigh… Ok, I’m just gonna show a picture:

Yes, ladies and gentlemen… What we have here is a Mazdarrari. A Mazda made to LOOK like a Ferrari! (crying)

Ladies, pleeeaaaaase do your homework and know your Ferraris vs. your Mazdas. Do not be fooled!

Advice: I know I’m going to get emails from some of you saying… “Oh my Gawd, I read your Car Red Flags article and I feel like you were talking about my main man! He owns a Mazdarrari on 24s, with a huge spoiler wing, a body kit, and a very loud exhaust! Ugh… but he is the nicest guy and I love him so much! What do I do???”

I got two words for you ladies – WINDOW TINTING.

If you’re going to be driving around in your man’s embarrassing car, you guys should atleast make sure the windows are tinted enough so that no one can look inside and actually SEE you. Double Limo should be plenty dark.

Love yallz

17 Responses to “Bad taste in cars? Bad taste period.”

  1. Candy 03/24/2011 at 12:32 AM #

    ok so some people are just into different things. your saying this matters? also that a guys car reflects directly on himself? are these personality red flags?

    i do like the pics you choose! thanks

    • Minor 03/24/2011 at 10:33 AM #

      Hi Candy, what I’m saying here is if a person decides to do these things to their car it is a RED FLAG that he/she has bad taste (so yes, personality Red Flag). Please realize that these are NOT dealbreakers, but simply warning signs (aka Red Flags). I am a big believer in “To each their own lousy taste” but sometimes this can be taken overboard as in the case with the Mazdarrari (A Mazda transformed to look like a Ferrari).

      Would you take your K-mart purse, stretch some fake Louis Vuitton fabric over it, and try to pass it off as an authentic LV?

      Thanks for reading!

  2. Randy 03/24/2011 at 12:38 AM #

    forget the Mazdararri! is that another Sasquach siting? RED FLAG that man!

    • Minor 03/24/2011 at 10:35 AM #

      Yeah, im not really sure what’s going on there! (scary)

      Thanks for reading!

  3. RPM 03/24/2011 at 10:48 AM #

    wow!!!… kick me in the nuts!!!

    • Minor 03/24/2011 at 11:25 AM #

      Hi RPM… Ok!

      Thanks for reading!

  4. 7" wins 03/24/2011 at 10:52 AM #

    loud pipes save lives, but only on “real” muscle, no one wants to here raspy import…(FYI flashy tips dont give you HP)

    • Minor 03/24/2011 at 11:23 AM #

      7″ what? Yes, agreed.

      Thanks 7 inch wins

  5. Mariano 04/13/2011 at 2:03 AM #

    This is interesting. Keep posting buddy !

  6. betuspromo 04/14/2011 at 4:15 AM #

    Amazing blog ! Bookmarked

  7. Doesn't Matter 04/16/2011 at 7:28 AM #

    By the way, a Mazda RX-8 doesn’t exactly qualify as a “piece of shit car.” It’s no Ferrari but still a decent sports car.

    • Minor 04/20/2011 at 8:51 PM #

      Agreed. But that pic was too good to pass up! Haha… Thanks for reading!


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